you're timeless to me

Now Hunny, listen to this song. I dedicate it to us. (:

Garth Brooks - The Dance
Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared 'neath the stars above
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye

And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance

Holding you I held everything
For a moment wasn't I a king
But if I'd only known how the king would fall
Hey who's to say you know I might have changed it all

And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance

Yes my life is better left to chance
I could have missed the pain but I'd have had to miss the dance

i'm leaving this place, for good.
i'd like to leave this place as memories of what we have left.
no one will love you like i did. (:

Once a upon a time

when we were happy and fine..

please ):

disappointments after disappointments.

tell me, just how much more must i give in to you? in my defence, you were the one who asked for one last chance. despite the fact that i wanna to keep us going, you're not helping. im not happy being with you, and im ashamed by this fact.

my heart's feeling all wrong.

two cents worth of time

i was just thinking about what's happening to us these few weeks or say, months. nothing's changing to make things better, neither have we stopped quibbling over the smallest matter. one last chance, we've agreed. will we make it? i hope we will, cos i want us to. it's hard, nowadays, to spend one whole day together without much disagreements. i've never tried so hard to make a man stay in my life, neither have i tried so hard to keep a relationship going. i dare say, that you're the man i wanna love, and you're the only man i wanna spend the rest of my 100 years with. i hope you'd still remember our promise 50 years later when our heads are covered with snow white hair and our skins starts wrinkling, we'll use all our remaining strengths to hold tight our hands and walk thru that park, together. it doesn't matter to me, the number of men who've declared their infatuations, or how many men i've loved. i've set my eyes upon your house and cash and car and heart. i wanna be the one you'll wake up to every morning, i wanna make you breakfast, i wanna slow dance with you at night, i wanna stargaze with you by my side. i often wonder how Bean and Sabean would look like, i bet they'll be pretty and handsome. i bet they are smart and obedient kids. and they'll love daddy and mummy so very much. we've yet to decide the breed of dog we want to have, have we? i want a Jack Russell, a Golden Retriever and a Husky. these are the many few reasons why i held on so tight, and trying so hard. Hunny, i need you in my life. lets make us work. (:

Short and Sweet

i like today. shortlived but sweet.

i spent the early afternoon with Hunny. Short but sweet.
we ate at Pizza Hut, and laughed and smiled all the way.

i spent the late afternoon with Enqi. Short but Happy.
we rot and ate and took pictures, like how we used to do.

i spent the early evening with Fen and Qi. Short but i like.
we sat at macs, for awhile. and did what we always do.

the boyfriend didnt come and fetch me after tuition, i guess it's good in a way. i learn to go home on my own, even though im afraid and had terrible cramps. things arent the same anymore. i listen and obey. im not really happy this way, but at least Hunny is. or so i think. anyway, Hunny and i are gonna catch Chuck and Larry soon. i cant wait! ohohoh, of cos, we're going tanning too. if Hunny keeps his word.

this is weird, its hard to please someone. dont you think?

All the used to bes

im reluctant to see or hear your voice.
im not even excited about our next meeting up.
i dont look forward to spending quality time together.

is this, the start of the end?
dont do this to me, dont let me cry alone. dont.
Hunny, tell me please, tell me whats happening to us?

Picture Perfect (:

It's just you and me and one spotlight Hunny

Ill look for your eyes

To keep me inside

When everything dies

But one last sunrise

And when we stand there together not scared

I'll dry your last tear

And then we're just air

Not the life i wanted.

i've been lacking the sleep i need, to mug my ass out for this Promos. But after the papers, i feel i've failed. Yet again, even though i really mugged the life outta me. I guess if im lucky enough, i'll make it through again. But i doubt it. My body feels so bloody exhausted, that just standing on the train from Town back home, sores my back. I couldn't open my eyes when i did most of the papers. Im probably the world's lousiest recalcitrant loser. Damnit. If i don't make it through this time, i'd like to go to Santa Maria College. But that'll mean leaving everything here for a year or so.

The family's moving. No matter what. If we do have the money, we'll move to East Coast's a little less than new condos. If not, then we'll shift to a smaller flat somewhere else. Of course, i would hope for the better one. Who wouldn't? heh.

Now that i self-declared for the promos to be over, i got no where to go. =/ im fucking bored okay. im so bored i wanna cry. fuck balls.

Desperate time calls for desperate measure

Dear PapaGod,
You've carried me through all my major exams, made sure i go on to the next level. From my PSLE to my O's, again and again you pushed me through. You want the best for me, all the time. Will you help me this time? I did mug you know, but a little too late i suppose. But still, i did try. All i need is to make it through this Promos, and i'll mug and depend on myself for my A's. I know empty promises were all i made, but this time, i feel the need to fufil this promise. I don't want my kids to go through what i am going through, i want better lives for me and my kids, and my mum of course. Will you help me again, PapaGod? Will you help Jack too? Please PapaGod. =/ Amen.

Loves, nic.

Status: Hiatus

Misses Much

I can't breath!

Let's play a little game.
It's called Take My Breath Away.

Here's how you play it:
`For every breath you take, slice your upper thigh.
`Collect the liquid that flows out, put it in a test tube.
`The one with the most volume wins!




yes, it is this painful.

Take my breath away

Just when i fell outta love, Benn found me a new love.
i swear he's hot and has a nice voice and I LOVE HIM.
i don't care if im gonna be a paedophile.

You can see him here: LOVE
You can hear him here: LOVES
OMG. HE'S SO MINE. <33s!


The rest of the post, is blank, read on..











































told ya. (:

wake up call

He's home, he said he'll buy us a private house at the end of the month and we'll rent this present house. it's quite interesting to hear it, like will he ever get tired of lies? it's like the story, of the boy and the wolf. hurhur, yess, of course.. Suspension of Disbelief.

i bought two tanks and B got himself a lime green tee from FOX at 8 bucks. how cool, we're gonna get our hair cut tomorrow. wait.. why am i blogging like those typical kawaiixxx girls? HURHUR.

i like talking to old friends. it makes me happy (:
the house is ultra clean, spick and span. but whats the use?
imma lose my room soon enough, unless suspension of disbelief turns reality. sighs.


i hate this.

heh

all was swell, i would say.

nothing's left of what i called Home

i want one too, a happy family. ):

i dont wanna fucking rent the rooms.
i dont wanna fucking give up my room.
i dont wanna fucking share a room with you.
i dont wanna fucking live with some strangers.
i dont wanna fucking stay in this house anymore.
it's not even a HOME anymore, it's so much like a HOTEL.

i refuse to stay with any dumb Malaysian factory workers or any stupid NTU students. I REFUSE.
i'll move out if i have to, but that will only make you more sad and worried, and i hate that.

i'm giving tuition, never asked a cent from you, paying my own phone bills, paying for whatever i buy. even when im so fucking broke, i starve. i didnt even ask any fucking cent from you. there're things i want so badly and i refrain myself from buying it. the money i could have used to get myself a laptop and camera, i gave you all. im fucking financially independent, from you at least.

why must you to this to what is left of my home? one without father, without proper home cooked meals, without a cosy family. now, one that's no different to a hotel. nothing's left. nothing.

d'you ever feel how i feel? d'you ever know how much i hate home? d'you ever know if i can stay out all my life i would? d'you? NO. you keep me at home, you think i love home, you think i dont feel as much as you do.

but i know, i know it's not your fault. it's that man's. as much as i love him, i fucking hate him, for doing these to us. Wiped his ass and walked away, to China. probably happily fucking some China whore, mass producing little China whores who'll come to Singapore just to indirectly cause hurt to more girls like me.

China, you ought to be ashamed of yourselves. You really need to teach your girls, to fucking keep their filthy yellow hands off married men.


No, i dont need pity me, neither do i need you to empathise with me.
oh yes, everyone has family problems. so, why are you reading mine?

one of the best people who crossed my path

we havent met for a year, but you never fail to read and tag.
but you know, but you know that i still love you.

HAPPY 18th TOHHUIFEN. (:

Coffee Club and Mugging

me loves you.


love the boy, love the watch.


this is retarded.


((:


It's just me and you.


Bangers and Mash. Why bangers? =X


Creamy Chicken Penne


It's deliciously tempting.


mmhmm, doesn't the look of it makes you hungry? (=

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine

Hello my Mr Sunshine. (:



I'm the apple of your eye. (:




This season, I'm in love with electric blue. Aren't they pretty?

*add your own captions where ever applicable.