Eight Months babyy <3

time flies, really.

see, that boy and that girl
has come eight months far now.
nope, it wasnt easy. definitely not.
but it certainly is so very sweet.
mmhmm, like pretty rainbows.

spiderman tomorrow(:

im only a girl

bitbybiteverypartofmeisfadingaway

it has never been easy

life's been tough on all of us.
and im so blessed to have jack by me.

/edited.
upon opening my bloggy.

jaaaaCk's nic's says:
im like chocolate in an oven

my silly babyy =)

Woebegone.

a moment of folly.

sweet for my sweets

no, im not dead yet. it's just that i got better things to do besides updating everyday. and, all those bothersome stuffs are getting in my way. then again, i dont really bother.

oh, sundays are God days. (:

that warm fuzzy feeling, i love. for all these 236 days, i love you.

life's not helping

im emotional because imma girl. you must understand, i told you before. if you dont wanna take my frustrations, you can choose to ignore me babyy. im sorry im like this, not that i want to anyway.

lol, my head's not better and im gorging on chilli. =D

the worst thing that i can do to myself is to forbid me from getting better.

stubborn tears just keep falling

is there anybody who feels the way i feel?
nobody feels how i feel, especially the ones closest to me.

im so hungry, yet i skipped dinner so i can come home early.
least mummy wouldnt get so angry, but she's not even home.

no, i dont like to cry. so i shall forbid tears from falling.


dont feel like going home,
dont feel like going school,
dont feel like going trainings.
HOME, school, volley.
what screwed up life is this?

undying love

you and me, till the end of time.

the world's turning

those silly smiles, are facades for you.


the entire world's turning, and im still here.
everyone's mugging, and im still enjoying life.

somehow, i have this feeling. as i feel less burdened,
i actually feel so much more frustrated in me.
i tear over almost everything these few days.
i know and i can see, that it's taking a toil on Baby.
i try to suppress it, but it just comes on me stronger.
this feeling, it feels like im... stressed up over nothing.

no, friends have never been free to hear me rant,
neither is my boyfriend free to listen to my cries.
if i ranted at them, all they could do is to keep silence.
and when im free, they are tied up with everything.
when im not, they have all the time in the world.
and when friends and Baby finally have that lil time for me,
that precious time became time for argues and whatnots.

school, other friends, work, hockey and everything else.
except time for nicole.

this probably would sound so effing emo, but it doesnt really matter now.
i feel lonely. =(

eye feast

okay bahbye (:

=)))

babyy's


and mine =D

<33s

dont tell me that i can make it on my own

I HAVEN'T SEEN HUIFEN AND ENQI
IN FORTY EIGHT THOUSAND EONS.

please tell me they haven't forgotten me,
please tell me that they haven't thrown me away.
please tell me that they still loves me,
please tell me that they want to meet me up soon.
please tell me that they haven't found new friends,
like the ones we had found in the four years there.

the moment i stepped into MI, or rather got posted here,
i knew that things would probably turn out like that.

no more small girl talks,
no more intense bitching,
no more girly shopping,
no more crazy laughters,
no more decent meals,
no more skipping of classes,
no more gatherings at mac,
no more checking guys out,
no more cursing of teachers,
no more copying of homeworks,
no more cam-whoring,
no more dirty cat fights,
no more extreme bickerings,
no more bubble tea after school,
no more gigging and smirks,
no more stained skirts,
no more loose bra straps,
no more bad hair days,
no more ducking away from walls,
no more screaming at lizards,
no more movie craves,
no more serious pmses,
no more mood swings,
no more super dirty jokes,
no more chatting on phones,
no more hanging at enqi's house,
no more huifen,
no more enqi.

)(*&^%$#*&^%$#)(*&^%$#@!

nic is a very hapy girl

FIVE WEEKS TO MY LONG-WAITED PLAY.
phantom of the opera on 20th may. yayness!
babyy just managed to get the tickets, yay!
nicole is a superultramega happy girl =)))

looked around and found some really pretty
blogshops, already linked them up on the left.
i wanna go shopping luh! but there's hardly time.
with A Divs coming and then exams, really tight!
hence, the convenience of online shopping.

was really upset yesterday luh huh, with myself.
coach scold me, babyy also say me. yet i know,
if they didnt care, they wouldnt even bother.
i get so very pissed with myself at times,
when i dont perform as what is expected of me.
i keep telling myself, to keep all the advice in my head.
but it always slips away, it's not that i dont try.
you dont know how bad i want to be in the team.
actually, i want us to win. SO BADLY OKAY.
as always, words that help dont come nice.

volley girls are really my lovelies okay,
i love all well, at least most of my lovelies!
hehs!

babyy's heading for his game at delta now,
and his phone died on him. =/

NIC IS A VERY HAPPY GIRL! ((:

=((

i need to be more focus.

cos i want it so bad.

loving and forgiving are you

BEANed with babyy this week.
super funny show ya, laughed so loud.
jack couldnt stop me even with
his hands covering my mouth half the time.
i love watching movies with jaaaack okay.
shall wanna watch somemore movies soon (:

school's out today, cos i couldnt wake up.
i didnt want to wake up, too tired lah.
if only i can do this all the time,
then nic'll be a very very happy girl.
spent the whole day with babyy ((:
babyy's gonna paint his room soon,
and his new bed and everything will
be coming this saturday, i think.
whee, i feel so very excited for him.

mummy was saying that i should change
my bed and cupboard and table and all.
practically a room make over yah. yay!
should be going down to Ikea soon soon.
i love Ikea lah, the stuffs are so pretty.
and it's cheap and i get to choose. =D
ohoh, i love Ikea's Swedish Meatballs,
even if i am dead broke when im at Ikea,
i can still enjoy super good hotdog bun. =))

wanna try asking mummy if i can
paint my walls too, i want it GREY.
babyy's new wall colour is my current
wall colour, i think. like super pale green.
havent seen it, but his sister says IT'S UGLY.

know what, i had the whole day to do stuffs.
and i still have two pending Lit essays. lols,
and it's still pending. i seriously think that
i really need to start doing work like now.
or maybe tmr's fine. hahahahaha. =/

training tmr, and the shoe's not really as
nice as what was shown in the picture.
but i think it's quite okay lah, was actually
what i wanted like last year. finally got it.
A' Divs starts next week! omg omg omg.
19th or 20th i think, not very sure.
man man man, this is so panicky.
groupings are YJ, PJ and VJ. yupss,
only threeee opp. how lucky yah.
i love my volley girls oh so much okays =D
Team MI can do it, i know we can!
ger, when are we getting our shoebags and bottles?
im like how penniless after buying my shoe.

i keep on forgetting i skipped thursday
and tomorrow's friday, friday's a short day.
oh silly, jack's got no training tmr he says.
he's gonna paint his room without me. =/
)(*&^%$#@!! i wanna paint paint too!

YAY, finally booked my date with QI.
next wednesday, 18th April. yay yay yay!
eh eh omson, omcow, omshit, ommenses.
craps, sakali got training, i cry arh. )(*&^%$#@!!
nvm, shall see okay qi. i love enqi! <33s

i think im quite random today,
but it's okay, random's good.
bahbye peeopleee. <33s

p.s did i say im a happy girl today? I AM! (:

mintutes filled with entertainment

hello human, i suggest you visit these sites,
click here or here or here or here or here. (:

i suppose yall enjoyed reading
human's really-cannot-make-it English
and all her attempts of perfecting them.
it's perfectly alright for her to feel
terribly empty in her skull.
I'd really like to see things from her
point of view but I cant seem to get
my head that far up my ass.
it's okay people, dont laugh at her.
she's very pretty okay. lolololol.
bet her boyfriend's super shortsighted,
like those nearing blindness kind.
maybe her boyfriend met her at the pound.
who knows? =/

human, whatever creature you are,
just wanna tell you that..
every female has the right to be ugly,
but dont abuse the privilege okay.
oh go ahead, type every vocab and all
on my board, it'll only take 10 seconds.
and also, whoever who said you looked
pretty and asked you to be yourself,
couldnt have given you worse advice.

try very hard to understand okay,
if you dont, you can always tag and ask.
or interpret it yourself, i can always correct you.
i'll be most honoured to help such pretty beings like you.

HEH,
come on lah, spammers dont affect me lah.
in fact, i welcome them. oh yes.
they make me feel very superior all the time. =)

people get so red-eyed, they just cant keep their jealousy to themselves.

I WANNA WATCH...

this


and this,


and this,


and this,


and of cos this.


LIKE SOON.

chocolate chip cookies. yums!

today is a really mean day.
i got cramps that hurt so bad,
it was almost like i had a baby stuck
in between my intestines turning
and twirling and fidgeting all over.
it hurts like RARR, and it hurt so much,
i felt so weak in my limbs.

i hate menses.
i'd rather be sick and lie on my
bed for a week, in exchange.
i'd rather eat porridge and drink
plain water, and be immobile for a week.
ohh, i really really hate hate menses.
why cant we just give birth
like once every four months,
and then we dont need menses every month.
lmao, nvm im not making sense.
i just hate menses lah okay.

oh, mr lee has been really nice today.
know why? cos he didnt come to school.
like how super nice of him today.
if only he's this nice every lesson.

tmr is a stupid day, i've got training.
and my friend is so sticky on me.
i think she doesnt know i hate her so much.
or maybe she doesnt really care if i like her or not.
truth is, i really really hate her know,
she's such an irritating thing and i resent her.
oh did i mention she has this other friend,
who brings me pain and agony?
really such a pain in my ass, cannot stand her.

i see them in school on some weeks in the month,
and maybe sometimes, only just sometimes,
i bump into them on the streets, just so unlucky.
they should really leave me alone you know,
i will really drown them in hot water some day.
or one day i'll burn them, until they go away.

and, i think that jack can chase them away,
maybe if jack was a lil fiercer and scarier,
they would pee on their pants til its soaked.
on some really happy occassions,
jack really did make them go away.
but they always return to find me again,
and i can do nothing at all about them.

i think she and her other friend should
just leave me alone, i dont need their company.
i just dont understand why do they always
have to stick together like stubborn glue.

stupid menses and idiotic cramps. sighs.


ohoh, its been a long time since jack and i last quibbled and im loving this feeling(:

thank you babyy.
for the warm water and tummy rubs((:

lessons for life

jack just taught me how to love. wholeheartedly. not just in love, but in life.

love, is loving the good and the bad.
love is accepting the wrongs and the ugly.
love is wholeheartedly giving yourself to the other.
love is compromising and forgiving.
love is kind and not selfish.

this reminds me of 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. see, God is with me all the time.

Love is patient and kind; it is not jealous or conceited or proud;
Love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable;
Love does not keep a record of wrongs;
Love is not happy with evil, but is happy with the truth.
Love never gives up; and its faith, hope, and patience never fail.
Love is eternal.

i'll still love you.

sometimes, she just cant help it but to be very sensitive to certain areas of conversation. like the saying goes: once bitten, twice shy. and when she gets very sensitive to these topics, she'll feel so upset and useless. but be assured, she tries very very hard to not think about it. sometimes, it gets so overwhelming, she just feels like crying out loud.

she cannot love him if she doesnt first love herself. and loving herself would mean protecting herself, not letting her heart get hurt again and again. of cos she knows that he loves her a lot. by committing with him, she has already made herself put down all those hurts before. she tries so hard, in fact, too hard to not bother about what's upsetting and hurtful. but she really really dont want anymore heartbreaks, cos then her faith for love would be waay below zero. its really inevitable, not that she wants to you know.

she trusts him you know. so much, that she almost lose control over herself. its just that her words and her actions sometimes, dont.. match. its really not her fault.

she's sorry for making him cry, she's sorry for seemingly not trusting him. she's so sorry cos he loves her so much.



sighs. im sorry.

love for keeps (:

this should be due like weeks ago.

because i know He holds the future

thank you boyfriend, for every single small thing. (:

Happy Easter! (:

ohoh, i love the Easter Song.
hello mary, remember the times in POA lesson. we'll just sing and forget about lessons. hahaha.

where art thou, PW?

1) i must understand the beauty of Project Work.
2) i must appreciate it's contents.
3) i must love doing PI.

okay, now i can start doing PI.

)(*&^%$#@!!!

dreams can come true

a picture to prove we're still very much in love and good. its kinda hard to break us up know, stop trying. we're quite enduring, and strong. after all, these seven months didnt come easy. i love you babyy. ((:


oh, today's Good Friday. this year's Holy Week's a bit boring, i dont know why. didnt go for church visting this year, feeling lazy. the crucifix reminds all Catholics what Jesus had gone thru to bring us salvation, treasure it oh so much ya?


yayness, Easter's coming! Easter Vigil tmr. man, surely reach home at midnight again lah, im so tired lah! anyways, i love Easter, loads of Easter Eggs to eat. haha, i esp love the chocolate eggs. shall buy some and share with A1 on monday!!


and and and, its really amazing to know how things actually happen and solved. super tiring to keep holding up the wall against friends. im like how glad and relieved that somethings are finally ironed out and cleared after so many months. tensions are not good people, try to avoid okay.


ohoh, the boyfriend's really a super nice and meticulous one. he'll make it an effort to pick me up even how tired he is and how late it is. he'll wait without complains and smiles even if he waited so very long. he'll bring me a wet towel to ease my headache, and kisses me when im frustrated. he'll save his favourites for me to eat, even if its the last one. his aircon's spoilt and he'll bring the fan so near, just so i wont feel warm. oooh, thank you dear. <33s



just so you know, i wont fall so easily. even if i fell, i'll stand smiling at you. (:

i'll always be that happy girl.

walls of indifferences

"and the spaces between ourselves, sometimes, is more than the distance
between the stars."

like said, its true you know. the walls are too much for hearts to pass thru.

anyways, today is fun. altho a little trumatised, lols. Holy Thursday today, had the sedar meal. it tasted different from previous years, yet it has always been the same thing. i guess as we grow and mature, we learn to appreciate things as they are.

friendships too, if she hates you for some unknown reason, then let her be. for He said, if some one strikes you on one cheek, offer the other. altho sometimes, it's almost unbearable.

i love my jack, so much okay. <3

change on the inside = change on the outside.

yadayada

i dont see why the need to break friendships cos im close to my boyfriend.
if you tell me, you dont do the same. then maybe i'll let you be.

overwhelmed by peniaphobia

some dingnasirahdong tagged me to do this lah. but its okay, it murders my time.

6 weird things about me

1. i love jack.
2. i've got entomophobia. i'll totally freak out okay.
3. i've got igyrophobia, man.
4. i've got coulrophobia, bloody red ugly nose.
5. i've got lygophobia, scary~
6. i've got pediophobia, lol the list can so go on.

7. actually, im not even weird, its just nas.

six people whom i REALLY want to do this;
1. jaaaaaaaack
2. enqi
3. gerlaine
4. grace
5. mary
6. apple

okay, done.

imma happy cept my aircon's sick >:(

im happy cos i went to cut and wash my hair today. and i likee having my hair cut, but i dont like it when people wash my hair for me, i'll get this ggrrrr feeling. like i feel itchy all over, bah. oh, did i mention i like my hair blow dry? hehe. (:

anywayss, uncle tony's son got baptised today. and he's so adorable can, and shawn's also ultra cute lah. i love the babies in my family, okay. so many lah, joelle emma victoria nigel ethan adelia shawn and the newly added jaden. and it's kinda amazing to see each of them grow up so fast, like i could still remember myself putting each of them to sleep and their saliva will stain my shoulder, esp jonathon okay. he's like 14 now lah. and i love my cousins, cos they're all so small and adorable. x)

oh happiness, know arh. suddenly i feel so weak and smiley, cos my green turtle's smiling at me while i type. aiyaya, i love jack okay. <33

Mr Weather has a problem with consistency. flood today, drought tmr. these kinda weather can make me fall sick, and i dont wanna fall sick okay. A Divs ia coming lah, 18 April. thats bout two weeks okay. the bimbos are training very hard know, friendlys almost every training, and self-training on every other day. although it's very lethargic, but i enjooy. =D

volley in MI really made me a couple of crazy friends. mad people like gerlaine and yuewei and apple. ultra bimbos like huimin and lenice. old granny hands like sabrina. super nice girlfriend like grace. mega handsome coach like sean. and so many others. school's fun because of all these maddies. we really go wild together okay, like ultra wild. i think this is what they say, birds of the same feather flock together. hahahaha. when i leave school, volley would definitely be an important part of MI that i'll never forget. mmhmm. (:

and of cos, i'll remember MI as:
the place i met and fell in love.
the place i fell and stand again.
the place i knew my love would last.
the place i had so many in common with jack.

from old to new, friends to none.
we held tight our hands,
and walked through all together.


there's so much about you that makes my heart flutter.