hahahaha.

im so OMBear happy!
but, im OMHais sad e-d.

i dont know why.
yesterday, san gen pan ye.
he smsed me. =DDDDD
he said.. ((:
its really sweet, but i didnt really love it.
really very very sweet.
and OMFish,
i replied shitloads of things.
i cant remember what..
HAHAHAHA.

you know,
if i ever knew,
i'd never let go either.

but then,
i went to bed,
and i thought.
why is he telling me this?
and then i got so emo.
and i cried in bed.

i.. was really grateful.
because he loved me.
i.. dont wanna hate him.
NO, i never want to.

but, it really hurts like hell.

i wanna hear sweet things, yes i do.
but it hurts.
hurts so much i wanna cry out loud.

sighs. i love him. yes i do.
i love him so much i wanna shout it out loud.
i wanna tell the whole world i love him.

sighs..
i dont need a reason to blame God.
and i dont want a reason to blame God.
i love God. and i wont blame him.
i know that maybe God,
he made me put this down,
so that something greater can come my way.

maybe he's testing us.
and if we can overcome this,
we'll live happily ever after.
HAHA.

what naive thinking.
i feel stupid now. -.-
but then again,
this is
all i can do.
all i can hope.
all i can think.

but i know,
tho he says he still loves me and all the sweet words.
he's actually falling for this other girl.
and i can tell tho he says that they'll nvr end up together.
it doesnt really matter if you end up together anot.
at least to me.
because, your heart is no longer here with me.

its just like the world cup.
like the world cup still goes on even when england's lost.
but to you, it already ended.
i suppose its the same.

i'm here without you baby.
and i deeply regret.
because we could have been so sweet.

if i had known things would end this way.
i'd prolly wont let it start in the first place.
because then,
we would have become really good friends
instead of being just aquaintence.
maybe it's no more than this.

i feel very lousy.
its all my fault.
i feel stupid. sighs.


3rd July 2006
5:47pm
















i really lovee.
i cherish you.
if only i had one more chance.
)):