Because whatever I am now, obviously isn't that good enough for him to want to start trying to want this as much as I want it. I have to cry myself to bed, not because I lost to another girl in trying to gain his attention, but because I lost to a stupid game and a few good friends.
And I thought years ago was bad enough, with him so obsessed with hockey and that few good friends. At least I could still sit and watch all his games, and I know so well that those guys are friends that Jack will never lose, even if it's 10 years from now. Friends I never have.
I may sound fucking pathetic here, but when Jack stops paying attention to me, no one else is. Oh trust me, I know that's not true, but he's the one who matters.
Right now, I sound like a bloody clingy, madly obsessed girlfriend. But truth is, I haven't seen my boyfriend for 3 days after our fight, which I honestly cannot recall what was it about and I have 21 days before he's serving the nation full time. And you know how hard it is, to have your boyfriend in the army for those of you who've gone through this shit. Oh lucky me, mine hasn't even started.
And may I add that he's alright about not texting or calling or talking or seeing me at all these past few days. And damn right is this entry gonna make him start texting me and meeting me for awhile till the next.
Oh you have no idea how this magical fountain is gonna change my life.
Please don't comment if:
- you've never been with a boyfriend for more than 3 years.
- you've never spent almost everyday with your boyfriend.
- you have no idea how these feel like.
- you're a guy.
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