Relieve the Good Ole' Days.

it's really when you grow up, and make sense of everything that you'll realise who's been good to you and who' not. it's only when you lose things that you'll start to appreciate and reminise all the good ole days. it's only when there's really nothing to be done, that you'll wanna remake the past. it's only when best friends part, that you'll realise how difficult it is to accept the fact that we've drifted so far apart.

honestly, despite me making fun of enqi and all her embarassments, ge so angry at all the silly things she does, ranting at her like she's my ranting machine, i miss her hella big loads. like best friends do. we've not been catching up, or chats on phones. even shopping or even just meet up. it's been months since i last saw her, all i know is what she tells me. and enqi doesnt tell anyone everything, we've been friends for so long, surely i'd know there's so much more to what she shared. and there's really nothing i can do, i can only trust and when everything fails for her, i trust she'll fall back on me. but, this trust isnt really stable now, she doesnt rant, nor does she complain or even tell me anything.

i feel really sad, when i see all other girlfriends meet up and catch up, shop and bitch together about everything. i was just wondering why arent i doing the same with fen and qi. then i asked myslf why, i couldnt get an answer, all i felt like doing was to tear.

as much as i hate wearing fugly uniforms and all the dumb homeworks back in secondary school, it has always been these two pals who's walked thru thick and thin with me. we fall out, and we patched things up. we bitch and we laugh. and if anything goes wrong, we know it's okay to fall on each other. days just arent the same anymore, we hardly have the time to even get a breather, much less catching up.

and if friends are only for a period of time in our lives, then why do we care so much, to even get so angry at all the many silly things that they do?

sighs, maybe it's just me. =/
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on the lighter note, i've been spending too much money these few days. so much, that even Nicole realised it. but hell yeah, i cannot deny that it has been so much fun with Babyy. ZOO tomorrow! (: yay, with Joelle and Babyy.

got lotsa pictures waiting to be uploaded. shall get all the pictures up someday, when my fat hands feel active enough. dame, i really feel so fat. my tummy, my thighs, my arms. omsucklingpiglet, my whole self is F**. (it feels like a taboo now, the word F**, damn it.) i've been eating quite a lot, but tell me how can anyone resist food eh? all i do when i go out with Jack is to eat, eat and more eat. crappys.

so, i've made up my mind and i keep telling myself that i'll really honestly genuinely sit down and start the long awaited revisions. next week. yes. no doubt about that, i really needa get my ass into the Us and get a decent enough job so i'll have enough dollar bills to stuff it into the faces of those who despise us now. not forgetting my few DB9s in the garage and all. oh, maybe some spare bills to wipe my ass after shitting. yeah, whatever.